Apparently Everyone Is Watching. Great.

Apparently somebody is always watching.

Which is a deeply comforting thought if you're five.

Slightly less comforting once you've lived a little.

Because let's be honest.

If somebody has actually been watching the entire time, there are definitely a few moments we'd all like removed from the official record.

Wrong decisions.

Questionable decisions.

Decisions that seemed perfectly reasonable at 2:17 in the morning.

And somewhere in the imaginary cosmic surveillance department, Jesus quietly says:

“I saw that.”

Well, shit.

But then the Devil leans around the corner.

“I saw that too.”

“And I approve.”

Maybe that's the funniest part of morality.

We like to imagine there is always a perfectly clear line between good and bad.

Then humans show up.

Suddenly everything requires context.

Intentions.

Three screenshots.

And a fourteen-minute explanation beginning with, “Okay, but listen...”

Assuming heaven and hell exist at all, maybe they're not fighting over us anymore.

Maybe they're just watching the show.

Which, honestly, makes much more sense to me.

I'm not exactly sitting here worrying about whether Jesus saw what I did Tuesday or whether the Devil approved of it.

I don't believe in any of that shit.

But as characters?

Fantastic.

One represents judgment.

The other represents temptation.

And somewhere in the middle is a human being doing something questionable and immediately developing an extremely convincing explanation for why it was absolutely necessary.

That's the joke.

Not religion.

Us.

Because we don't need a Devil to get ourselves into trouble.

We're perfectly capable of doing that shit on our own.

If your sense of humor lives somewhere between questionable decisions and cosmic disapproval, this one probably belongs to you.

Find the “I Saw That Too — And I Approve” design on Redbubble.